Here is your video training on ANGER:

a 5-step method to safely process anger, express it, suppress it & utilize it as a means of power and evolution.

Take your time to watch each video and most importantly do the "homeplay" (assignments) after each video.

My sincere wish is that you'll do this training step by step and become a good friend with your anger! Do reach out if you have any questions.

Emotional Wellbeing

What to do with "Negative" Emotions

The importance of negative emotions

#emotions #relationships #anger #negativeemotions #emotionalhealth #spiritualbypass #Shakti #awakening

The quality of our life depends on the quality of our relationships. And the quality of our relationships is defined by our emotions.

We all want to feel joyful and free. And we don’t want to feel anxious, lonely, sad, afraid, angry… We all have an aversion towards negative emotions and we have fear towards strong ones such as grief or anger… We associate them with not feeling safe. We need to root ourselves in our internal safety to be able to feel so-called negative emotions. Also, usually, there are no healthy role models.

Everyone around encourages us to get over it, to let it go as soon as possible. So we don’t know how to deal with negative emotions and we suppress them. Even in spirituality being peaceful and equanimous is the goal, negative emotions are seen as not spiritual. Many practitioners are seduced into the spiritual bypass: turning off uncomfortable feelings in the spirit of evolvement, often masquerading as simple compassion. They are then not addressing their desires and not demanding what they want.

Emotion is energy. In the heart of any emotion is Shakti, the essential energy of creation, the universal force of life. If we don’t allow our emotions to be felt we use much of life force to dam the river of Shakti. We are building walls inside not to feel it again.

AND when we don’t feel negative, we don’t feel positive.

We Need to Awaken!

Your "homeplay": Start noticing your negative emotions.

What are your relationships with negative emotions? How do you deal with them?

Three unhealthy ways of “dealing” with anger

#anger #emotions #relationships #negativeemotions #emotionalhealth

Most of us had no models for how to deal with anger, so anger became unsafe. Also, anger is often viewed as an inappropriate emotion, especially for women. Without healthier, more integrated paths for expression, we’re left with 3 options.

Aggressive: Out-of-control immediate reaction - destructive and disempowering

Passive-Aggressive: Holding anger in and taking everything personally - creating a disconnect and refusing love

Repressive: Avoiding anger due to fear or particular mental concepts - not addressing one’s desires

Your "homeplay": Become more aware of your anger including its milder forms of irritation or frustration. What are your ways of dealing with anger? Which one of the three is most familiar? How do your loved ones deal with anger?

Shall I express or suppress my anger?

#anger #emotions #relationships #negativeemotions #emotionalhealth

In this video you will:

~distinguish between ''suppressed'' and ''repressed'' anger

~understand why you need to express anger

~understand why you need to suppress anger

~learn 2 techniques of self-control that help to suppress anger

Note: Suppressing anger won’t work well till your repressed anger is processed.

Your homeplay:

1. Get even more tuned in to your emotions. Learn to observe and identify your anger at its early stages of irritation or annoyance.

2. Start practicing (a) self-control technique(s) and learn to suppress your anger at the moment.

Dignify & Express your Anger (Steps 1&2 of DEFRA Embodiment Method)

#anger #emotions #relationships #negativeemotions #emotionalhealth

I’ve developed a 5-step method to embody anger & utilize it as a means of power and evolution. This method allows to let go of reactivity and prevents moving from frustration to rage too quickly. This eventually offers a liberating sense of sovereignty in life and freedom and harmony in relationships. In this video, I explain how to do the first two steps.

Step 1. Dignify your anger. Bring up in your memory one specific situation or a person that makes you feel angry. Acknowledge the anger: “I am angry” and make space for it: “It’s ok to be angry”. We equate anger with negativity and it’s easy to associate anger with not feeling safe. Even in the classical yogic texts, including Bhagavad Gita, anger is a demon. Only in the Tantric approach, there is a different understanding: in the heart of any emotion is Shakti, the essential energy of creation, the universal force of life. Honor anger as Shakti and say yes to it: “I am angry and I’m not bad. I am still a lovable beautiful being”. If you feel no anger, remember feeling abandoned, offended, mistreated, or sad. “I give myself permission to feel angry”.

Step 2. Express your anger. Find a time and a safe space where you can safely embody your anger and let it flow freely through you. Energy needs to move. Express your anger through physical movement and sound. Shout, punch pillows or dead trees, jump and shake.

Note: You may not need this step once you release accumulated repressed anger and become more familiar with the passive embodiment that happens during step

Your homeplay: Practice these two steps regularly! Keep expressing anger in a safe environment. If you repressed much anger throughout the years, you might need to do anger expression many times to find your big relieve.

Feel your anger (Step 3 of the DEFRA Embodiment Method)

#anger #emotions #relationships #negativeemotions #emotionalhealth

I’ve developed a 5-step method to embody anger & utilize it as a means of power and evolution. This method allows to let go of reactivity and prevents moving from frustration to rage too quickly. This eventually offers a liberating sense of sovereignty in life and freedom and harmony in relationships. This is also the way to heal our wounds of separation from each other and the planet.

Step 1. Dignify your anger

Step 2. Express your anger (see the previous video)

In this video, I explain how to do the third step.

Step 3. Feel your anger fully as sensations in the body and breathe deeply to catalyze transmutation. Keep witnessing it - it’s just energy. Feel where the sensations of anger are in the body and what exactly they feel like. Keep letting go of the story and get back into the body more fully: “Yes, I have a good reason to be angry but I now just stay within the body, just my somatic experience of anger matters”. At the end of this step, you can add EFT, conscious body shaking, intuitive stretching to let go of any residue, or/and meditation, massage and anointing the body with essential oils (bergamot, lavender, and chamomile work well).

Your homeplay: Practice feeling your anger or/and other emotions in your body, as purely somatic experience.

Recognize the true cause of your anger and act upon it (Step 4&5 of the DEFRA Embodiment Method)

#anger, #emotions, #relationships, #negativeemotions, #emotionalhealth

In this series on anger, I share my 5-step DEFRA method to embody anger & utilize it as a means of power and evolution. This method allows to let go of reactivity and prevents moving from frustration to rage too quickly. This eventually offers a liberating sense of sovereignty in life and freedom and harmony in relationships. This is also the way to heal our wounds of separation from each other and the planet.

Step 1. Dignify your anger

Step 2. Express your anger

Step 3. Feel your anger fully as sensations in the body (watch my previous videos)

In this video, I speak about steps 4&5. Once you feel your anger fully, step 4 - recognizing its cause - may happen naturally. Understand that beneath your anger there is always a demand, a wish, a strong desire and a pain of not getting it fulfilled.

Anger = passion + pain

It’s important to recognize what this unsatisfied desire is exactly about so then you can do something about it which is step 5 - act. Focus on the desire beneath the anger, dignify it and empower yourself by taking action - honor this Shakti energy of anger.

Your homeplay: practice the DEFRA method till the last steps of recognizing and acting upon it.

I also included two short videos to help you to understand

how to breathe to live a long and healthy life, and

what type of breathing to choose at any given moment,

say when you need to calm your mind down, or to energize yourself.